HeLiUm BoNg 3


Well, with the summer holidays here and with the weather looking more miserable than a vegetarian realising that his dinner wasn't a soya substitute. HB6 takes a stroll around the "indie" music stores and manifests itself onto the unwelcoming fansheet reading community in search of people who actually enjoy reading it. Since last issue I've discovered a few new things. First of all, the April Fool jokes in 'zines are getting worse, HB recieved it's first good review from SONIC BIRTH *after* I spent half an issue ripping the piss out of them (I'm a bit thick, aren't I? Shooting my mouth down my only fans!), I've been voted one of the most likely people to get kicked in by REJECTED & then it ends up that I'm sponsored by the BNP as discovered by S@E. Seems like that fascist influence of mine is shining through.

I don't know where I earn this fascist label. I mean , so I eat meat, I'm not an anarchist & I don't boycott. Hey! Being your average teenager doesn't make you the next Fuhrer, does it? Am I a hypocrite for listening to Propaghandi & drinking coffee in GOD, & then heading down to McDonalds while listening to Sell Out - Corporate - Capitalist bands on my Walkman(TM)? I like Propaghandi's music, but I don't really agree with some of their beliefs, but saying that you can't like one without the other is a load of old, white, chalky dog poop. I'm sure alot of you are fans of Minor Threat but aren't Straight Edge. basically what I'm trying to say is that you can look between the lines if you want to, but you shouldn't feel compelled to.

As you may, or may not have noticed. This edition of HB is around 4 months late because I've hardly had any spare time to write. If I'm not out with my girlfriend (Hello Emma).

I was trying to finish off projects for school and I had to write a novel for English. Transition year. Don't ya just love it? It's a doss until you realise that the 5 or so projects you have to do have to be handed in next Monday, then you try and get them done on the Sunday. You fail miserably and hand in crumpled sheets of paper with "Skool Pojikt" scrawled in Crayola on the top. By now, you've decided that you'll never pay your 8 yr old brother to do your homework again, or at least try and do it yourself in future.

Summer holidays ARE HERE! Ah yes... I'll be looking forward to the endless hours on the bus filled with Spanish students with those shitty, coloured, bead, plait yokes hanging out of their hair, sleeping in until 4pm, then heading into town with the spare change you collected down the back of the sofa for the past month to get a pint with your mates, those barbeque parties set on the wettest days of the year, gatecrashing someone's End of Leaving/Junior Cert party, going to a concert in the Point & getting thrown out by those big bald gorillas, waking up in someone elses flat with shapes shaved into your head and a nice green streak dyed through the middle of your hair & then meeting someone who you think is the soundest person on earth then figuring out that they're complete pricks at the end of the summer.

It looks like I'm confined to the Emerald Isle for another year. Considering I haven't been on a proper holiday since I was 12, I'm a bit desperate for some sun, sand and Sangria, so anyone with a spare ticket to Majorca and a few hundred quid to spare, send it to the usual address.... I'll See Ya So...


Contact OLY by snail mail at:
HeLiUm BoNg, c/o The Irish National Front, ROCK LAWN, Leopardstown Road, Sandyford, Co. Dublin.